Originally posted: June 22nd 08
I got into a fun convo last night which led to this post. I took a lil time and honestly thought about what I find sexy… and I feel like these are the ingredients to someone who would truly turn me out:
1.Honesty – Good lord if this isn’t the sexiest damn thing on the face of the earth. When I say honesty, I’m not just talking about not telling lies. I mean, not being afraid of saying what you like and what you are into. Honestly saying when something isn’t working for you, and being willing to work toward fixing these things, that shit is sexy. Honestly causes a level of comfort in the relationship. A feeling of, i know what you like, and i know if you didn’t like it, you would say something about that. (Honesty doesn’t equate to being an asshole though. Staying clear, yet polite is the way to make it work. At least for me.)
2. Intelligence – There is nothing greater than having pillow talk with an intelligent person. The convo can go in so many directions, there are so many awesome references that only other people of equal or greater intelligence will get, and you feel like you haven’t wasted your energy on somebody that may not be worthwhile in the long run. At least the convo is worth it. I’ve been in conversations with ladies who I’m sure could just talk me straight to bed if they wanted (thank goodness for willpower on all parties involved) intelligence is such a turn on for me because it feels good to know that in the end, this person I’m giving myself to is more that just a cute face.
3. Vulnerability (in the sense of opening yourself up to someone else) – this goes along with honesty. In being honest with yourself, you have to be willing to admit your flaws. Seeing someone boldly face their fears, admit a struggle that they have dealt with, or fight a personal struggle gives that person more of a character. I don’t know about you, but I don’t think a one dimensional being is all too sexy. I don’t want to date superman (or Supergirl I guess) because that’s too perfect, everyone has to have go through something. It makes me wonder what you are hiding, and what you are afraid of. Don’t be scared baby, show me ya soul!!!
4. Artistry – Speaking of show me ya soul. OMG, artist are sexy. its the whole idea that you create things out of nothing but the energy that surrounds you. there are few things that are sexier than having an artist create for you. if something happened between me and someone and i came into an open mic and she offered me her art, i would melt….. the idea just makes me swoon…. i feel like you cant have my heart without the art, and well. the quickest way to my heart is through artistry.
5. Commitment to Change – Having a passion to change with world for the better is so sexy to me. I’ve committed so much time and energy to helping people (through multiple causes that i wont go into right now) that i really cant be deeply attracted to someone who isn’t donning something for the greater good. at least volunteer somewhere. i guess the commitment to change thing shows another level of purpose, which makes me feel a lil bit better about giving pieces of myself to this person. and it give me the hope that we will both grow from the experience.
Things that just missed my top five:
An Interest in Fitness
the list continues, but I can’t put myself all the way out there…
Peace and Safety,