I was an at event last week

in a room of love

of celebration

and there was a moment

when the significance of the space

of the people present

of the occasion

sat on me

unlike a lover on a lap

i placed my hand over my partners heart

and cried

i mourned my lover while still falling

i mourned my mother while she’s still breathing

i mourned my future selves

and my past selves

all in the moment

After

i drank

and laughed

and kissed

and swore off the worry

that keeps wrists locked

and professions unspoken

and i’m still mourning.